Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

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Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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Pretend to cough in class so other people could pretend to cough

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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Wish I could hang out with some people from this site sometimes.

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right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

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I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

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When I use deodorant, I flap my arms like a chicken a couple of times to get some air moving under there...

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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sneeze without closing my eyes

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.