Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

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I wonder what a baby is saying when they are telling you off?

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

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I always cry when I pray.

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Attempting to start phychic conversations with people in public

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Counting the lines on the street as they pass the edge of your cars window.

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Like a toy until it breaks.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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whenever there's a fight on facebook, i sit back and read it and i'm just like "people are stupid hehe"

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Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

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Look at the time but have to look again 3 seconds later because you forgot.

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Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

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I sometimes feel like I am the only one like me in this world

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When I'm on an escalator going up, I always imagine myself falling back and how incredibly painful (and possibly bloody) it must be.

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

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Smell your hands to see if there dirty.

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I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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I often think I have the greastest taste in everything

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Not expecting anyone to come over, some one knocks on the front door, mute the TV and hope they just go away.

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I sit in a chair upside down and pretend like i'm walking on the ceiling.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.