When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

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Sometimes I kiss my hand and pretend it's a person I like.

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I look for comments in this site that are on or close to 0 so that when i like or dislike them, i make a difference to the outcome :)

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Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

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never feel sad enough after being told a sad story

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

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When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

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I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

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Think of a song, tv show, or movie for a brief moment. Hear/see it the next day.

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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Forgetting the same word over and over again and having a spaz attack when you can't remember it for more than a couple of seconds.

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Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

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Fart at home

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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go on a diet, buy a lot of healthy food, eat it all the same day. 2 weeks later repeat.

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Sometimes when it's very windy, i Loudly yell "Stop". The Wind most often seem to lower it's intensity or completely blow off.

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I talk to myself while playing games so I don't feel lonley!

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Secretly open a packet of something or spray some deodorant in a shop to check what it looks/feels/smells like. Then put it back and pick up the one behind because you just used/opened the one you were just holding.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.