Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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When Im bored in a house that has leafy/floral wallpaper I follow the stem with my finger all the way up to the top of the wall and then go back down again and think of a route that gets you all the way to the other side of the wall.

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run up the stairs when its night so that the monsters dont catch you

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You imagine your future self visiting you and tell you about your life.

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Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

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When I eat M&Ms, Skittles or Froot Loops, I always make sure to leave one of every color for the end so I could eat them all at once. #rainbowinmymouth

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shag your mom

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12

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"Hey, did you see that new episode last night?" "Yeah!" "Do you remember that part when he ran through the city?" "Yeah!" LIES

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When I'm peeing in the urinal, I aim to the side so it doesn't deflect back on me.

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Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

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Sometimes I see on the clock, the seconds needle go back 1 second and then never do that again for the rest of the day/week or whenever I'm staring at the clock for it to happen again. -Mike

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popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

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When I am walking and accidentally touch a strangers hand I pretend it never happened -Marquez, P

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

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Wasting a whole bunch of time trying to find how to make one and realizing it was at the top and that you forgot what you were going to put in the first place.

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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I think SpongeBob and Patrick are rude, inconsiderate a_holes. ... That's right, I'm an adult and I watch SpongeBob. lol

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Wonder what I would have said to my dad if I knew he was going to die

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Press the Microwave open button at 0:01 to feel like you defused a bomb and avoided that stupid beeping.

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On YouTube, if someone comments a time in the video (or in the description) I always click it for fun, even if it doesn't work. Like if someone comments "it's 4:12 right now" on a 2 minute video I click the link.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.