I always poke myself in the eye when I put on mascara, then have a wild hand spasm so it gets all over my face.

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

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feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

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Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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When I hear a sound that I don't know what is, while I'm in an unfamiliar place, I wipe off and then touch as many surfaces as possible. It makes me think that if I'm taken by some scary person, my fingerprints will be easily found. I'm not sure why that would help in many cases, but it makes me feel better.

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Pretend to talk on the phone when you see someone you don't want to say hello.

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When I first start dating or seeing someone I write down options for conversation starters before I phone them in case it goes silent.

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Go on Omegle video chat and worry that you'll see someone you know

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When I'm trying to sleep if both my legs are under the duvet it's too warm. Both legs out it's too cold. When I have one leg out and on the duvet it's just right. I sometimes also put my leg against the wall when it's cold.

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When I'm watching a youtube video, I worry about how much time is left because I'm concerned the video maker won't wrap it up in time before the video ends.

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Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

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almost asleep and your body randomly jerks and scares you

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That microscopic flying things that follows my eyes' motion, especially when i look up in the sky.

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When listening to awesome music I perform a subtle headbanging motion.. Then I look around to see if anybody is staring at me like I'm retarded.

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I put salt on buttered toast...

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Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

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Sometimes I stay as still as I can and stare at myself in the mirror until it scares me and I freak out about who I am and why I'm living. I have to think of my family and memories to snap out of it.

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When I'm bored I think of what it would be like to be a women.

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When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"

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I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

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when i take a shit and smoke i dont throw the cigar in the wc so the smoke wont come to my nose

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Apologizing to things when I drop them and feeling stupid afterwards

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.