I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

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I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.