- Things You Think Only You Do

i masturbate with my feet

Sitting down in the shower

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

I have a phobia of incest

Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

Go for a 10 mile run.

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

I chew my ice cream.

when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.