you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.