After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

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When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

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I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

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I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

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use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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Eating chicken at KFC.

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.