Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.