While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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Picking my nose.

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.