I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Put my hand under the pillow in bed to get orgasm

thumb_up thumb_down -131

Get freaked out when door bell or phone rings when you are doing something you are not supposed to.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

When walking on an old looking bridge I try to get off quickly and before anyone else gets on there because all I can think about is it giving way and me falling to my death/being very wet

thumb_up thumb_down +65

when someone says something like 'it's too late' i always start singing 'to apologizeeeeee' even though i think people are annoyed of me always singing along to their sentences and changing the meaning, but i just cannot stop it

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Lie in bed and wonder what happens whe you die, get depressed and come on this site for reassurance

thumb_up thumb_down +156

When one of those sad sappy abused dogs commercials comes on, you change the channel really fast to prevent from crying.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Whenever you are in a quiet room and are trying to eat a food that is very loud to chew (like chips) you try to chew slowly or alter your chewing style so noone will think your too loud

thumb_up thumb_down +53

I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

thumb_up thumb_down -41

looking at the bottom when i meet foreigners talking among themselves... dang. no subtitles.

thumb_up thumb_down -111

Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

thumb_up thumb_down -115

Pick giant boogers and eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

when someone is talking about something i have no idea of and then asked me if i agree I'm like: oh yes! and then promptly changing subject so they won't find out

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Type in "Things you think only you do" then feel better that alot of people do the same stupid or smart things.

thumb_up thumb_down +156

ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

thumb_up thumb_down +50

whenever I see those commercials where there is two people talking to each other but they constantly look at me it really irritates me

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

I scold or point at my electronics and tell them "No, bad!" whenever I push the wrong button or shut them off on accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

I twist my pubes into little spikes when I pee.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Squeezing my cat's face back so it looks Chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

thumb_up thumb_down -106

See the person you like at school, have a quick random sexual thought about them, le random boner appears, and you flip out in your mind

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Sometimes I think and feel that I am the most voted man on Horsehead Network, I got no idea why. Moral the friendly r*pist: I dnt know what that means though... Or do I? ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.