Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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make south park refferences every day

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

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Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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When I go to the shops I like to park my car next to a specific coloured car so I can find it afterwards.

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

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Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.