When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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Poo really loud

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.