I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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fap

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.