you know how everyone talks about making life decisions in the shower and thinking about life?.....yeah thats me on the toilet

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this is a terrible website and i hate you

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whenever I see those commercials where there is two people talking to each other but they constantly look at me it really irritates me

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Stick ur thumb between ur first and middle finger without realizing it

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I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

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Mentally preparing yourself to step on a crunchy-looking leaf, only to discover it is in fact soggy, soft and unsatisfactory.

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Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

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play with a knife and pretend to be a master blade wielder

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Sometimes I think and feel that I am the most voted man on Horsehead Network, I got no idea why. Moral the friendly r*pist: I dnt know what that means though... Or do I? ;)

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Flush the toilet before peeing to see if I can accomplish peeing before the water flushes away. :)

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I control water in the shower.

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singing along to a song that you think you know the words to.. but you dont

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Rub boogers under the arm rest on the couch.

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When I hear a sound that I don't know what is, while I'm in an unfamiliar place, I wipe off and then touch as many surfaces as possible. It makes me think that if I'm taken by some scary person, my fingerprints will be easily found. I'm not sure why that would help in many cases, but it makes me feel better.

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Moral: Damn I clicked on pointless super powers how did I get here! Moral: I wrote the "thing only I do" below :P

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When I'm walking I pretend that I'm staying in the same place and moving the world beneath me.

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R A P E Children

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When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

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I scold or point at my electronics and tell them "No, bad!" whenever I push the wrong button or shut them off on accident.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Do math in ur head at night to help you fall asleep.

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As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

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If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

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waking up from an amazing/awesome dream and spend the rest of the day thinking up of new senarios to come after...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.