I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

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You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.