When i lie, i try not to swallow because i think they'll notice - John

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Use more toilet paper than you need, just because you feel like it cleans your ass more.

thumb_up thumb_down -91

Take a dump in the dark... Anyone but me?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Praying to God even though you tell people you're an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

When I wear a backpack I constantly check to make sure all the pockets are zipped

thumb_up thumb_down -67

I poop on the side of my house in the morning so I do not have to make noise then come back in.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -84

you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

thumb_up thumb_down -3

when on a bus, pretend to fail to see your acquaintances to get some rest and avoid boring conversations.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

When I'm riding in a car, i squeeze my toes everytime the car passes a dotted line in the road or when theres a curb

thumb_up thumb_down +75

I can't help spitting into the toilet when I piss, let it drop out my mouth and hit the water to see if I can get it in the center.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If I'm doing something that involves two ppl i race even if the other person doesn't know it and if i win i get a huge ass grin which is awkward sometimes

thumb_up thumb_down -51

If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

thumb_up thumb_down -97

Poking your eye to see the black circle at the corner of your eye

thumb_up thumb_down -131

While lying in the tub the water gets cold so u turn back on the hot water with ur feet bc u are too lazy to get up and turn it on with your hands

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Mispronounce a word that you have a billion times before because you couldn't figure out what it said for a second.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Sometimes...when no one is home, i talk and dance with my dog as if he was person :)

thumb_up thumb_down

invent arguments in my head with people to hone my debate skills for future arguments.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

while taking a bath, I imagine my knees, belly, arms etc poking out of the water are islands, and i imagine little people running around on them

thumb_up thumb_down -32

when no one is home I grab my sisters boobs she has big ones I mean it.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

scripting the blackboard with your fingernails? no problem, but just the imagination of biting on an ice cream stick out of wood and then moving it through your teeth makes me go crazy!

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.