shag your mom

Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

When I eat M&Ms, Skittles or Froot Loops, I always make sure to leave one of every color for the end so I could eat them all at once. #rainbowinmymouth

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

Find different ways to crack your knuckles when you're bored. (I have found 7 ways to crack a finger and I can crackj my hand back

When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

Love an outfit on others/mannequin, but hate it on me!

Any time I hear someone speaking with an accent, I start mimicking that accident. –Ikka

I make it sound like i'm ordering for more than one person when I'm really only getting fast food for myself.

FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

Count the number of letters in a word or phrase.

Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

On YouTube when I go to like a comment or a video. I click the Like button 2 or 3 times just to make sure it went through.

Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

I'm paranoid of EVERYTHING. When I enter a room, I inspect it for cameras. When I'm in the bathroom I cover all the cameras on my iPod, Phone, etc. When I do something I'm not supposed to do on the computer (such as download music for free), I cover the webcam to assure the government can't see me. I control my thoughts 24/7 at fear that someone will read my thoughts. I have a strict feeling the someone is always watching me. I fear subliminal advertisements also. To sum everything up you could just read the first part. I DONT TRUST ANYTHING OR ANYONE! I'm Not sure if anyone else is as paranoid as I am...

Skip peeing before bed because you dont feel like it, knowing that in about 15 minutes youre going to have to get back up because you wont be able to fall asleep until you go pee.

Go outside and pee.

wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.