Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.

trying to look cool when you're driving past other cars.

even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

If you see someone singing in a car, then search on the radio stations to find the matching song to the the miming you see.

when on a bus, pretend to fail to see your acquaintances to get some rest and avoid boring conversations.

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Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

every bite i have of a sandwich, i need to have a sip of a flavored drink to "soften the bread and make it taste good".

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

If a donkey and a angle fish where to pro create what would be the out come? They can't mate a donkeys a mammal and a angle fish is a fish

I translate (parts of) songs into different languages in my head. I try to do it as good as possible.

im going to rape that girl

tries to beat the search from loading the results before Im done typing my search when using youtube for xbox 360

I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

Pronouncing 'garage' as 'grozhh'

Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.