I try to eat my favorite foods slowly so I can enjoy the taste, but end up eating it really fast anyways

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

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When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

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When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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wonder who wrote these things

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.