feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

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Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Smelling food to see if its spicy.

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I push the door open with my stomach

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

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While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

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When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.