Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

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I hit the frig after sex

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

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i open the cuboard door tosee if theres anything to eat and if theres nothing there i close it and go to the fridge if theres nothing there i go back to the cuboard =)

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.