Pretend it doesn't hurt when someone I try for rejects me, but it does hurt, a lot.

One time I went to my old primary school and while I was there I needed the toilet. So I go use the schools and was shocked at how small everything was I guess because I haven't been there in a while

When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

When Im bored in a house that has leafy/floral wallpaper I follow the stem with my finger all the way up to the top of the wall and then go back down again and think of a route that gets you all the way to the other side of the wall.

Whatever situation I am in, I always start to invent rhythms with everything i have around, e.g. my legs, voice, tables or sometimes even the ground.

popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

Walking with your friend talking about everything then you and your friend walk by someone you don't know and it gets awkwardly quiet

Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

Everytime I get in my car at night, I turn the light on and check behind the back seats to see if there's anyone waiting for me. Then lock the doors when all is safe.

When I eat M&Ms, Skittles or Froot Loops, I always make sure to leave one of every color for the end so I could eat them all at once. #rainbowinmymouth

avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

I am wearing ear buds even though I'm not actually listening to anything.

I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

Wasting a whole bunch of time trying to find how to make one and realizing it was at the top and that you forgot what you were going to put in the first place.

Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

I ejaculate fire and glory

Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.