Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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I say random stuff when I wake up. Just to make sure my voice is still working.

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right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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sing like a pro in da shower

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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chew on the side of my teeth

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.