thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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Sleep in your jeans because you think it feels comfortable in the morning.

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When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.