Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Hit the enter key really hard when finishing a long piece of text that you have just written.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

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When I am making toast I spread the butter or jam with a spoon

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

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make those little rectangles with your mouse on the computer get so close that they are together and you cant see them and try to move to the left or right, keeping the lines together so you cant see them.

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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I always paranoidly think that someone else might see what I see through my eyes he can't hear what I hear and he can't smell what I smell he can only see and if I close my eyes he falls asleep automatically I try to avoid thinking this but that's impossible

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Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

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Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.